20 Years

Today marks 20 years since Mary and I have been married. It seems hard to believe that it has been that long already, but 2 decades and 2 children later I am happy to say we are still together.  I don’t know where I’d be today or how I would have made it without her.

Like many kinds of relationships, marriage is one that is full of ups and downs, highs and lows, excitement and mundane, anticipation and disappointment.  What I think makes a successful marriage is a very unique kind of  relationship however is how much you learn about yourself.

Nothing will reveal your selfishness like the marriage partnership does.  You can often put your own emotional needs on hold for a period of time, particularity during a dating or courtship period, in order to focus and impress your mate, but for a relationship to get through all of the peaks and valleys of a life time, you have to be willing to let your goals, ambitions and desires be brought together with that of your spouse.  Not so that you loose your individuality but in order that God can truly “make one” from the two.

I have found that my nature tries to fight this and even rebel against it but it is in those battles that I have learned that God is teaching me how to be more like Jesus.  There are lessons to be learned that only come with time and sacrifice but the other thing which makes a marriage unique is the blessings that come from fighting through those battles and learning how to “become one”.

I have been surprised to also learn that you never get it all figured out. It is a life-long process that even after 20 years, shows me I have plenty more to learn!  I am just glad I have Mary to learn from and with and look forward to the next 20 years together!

Something that God has shown us is how blessed we are in the grand scheme of things.   There are so many things we have and take for granted and God wants us to demonstrate his love and compassion to those less fortunate.  To that end, Mary and I are celebrating our 20th anniversary by partnering with Charty: Water.  We want to help bring clean drinking water to a few of the one billion people in the world who don’t have access and would ask that you consider helping us celebrate our marriage milestone by making a contribution to the campaign instead of any gifts for us.  This short video will give you an idea of how the desperate need so many are in and how Charity: Water is making a difference.  Thanks for celebrating with us by helping others!


  1. Happy 20th Anniversary to a very special couple! I just love your hearts and how you want to help so many people. I look forward to the 25th and helping to bring clean water to people in need! You guys are the best!

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